I’m not sure how people do it — marriage, parenting, working, hobbies. How does that even work?
As you can tell, one of the things that I’ve let go of is this blog. It isn’t because I don’t have things I want to share (because I do), it’s that I don’t have time to share them. If I’m going to write a blog post these days, it’s for work — I get paid to do it. If I’m going to share a photo, it’s going on Facebook or Instagram — both are easier. If I have a quick thought, it goes on Twitter (and sometimes doesn’t make sense and comes out of NO WHERE). If I notice an interesting bookish trend, it goes on Goodreads (listopia has become my friend).
I have all of these other outlets, that force this one aside. It’s unintentional, but it happens. This isn’t the only hobby that gets squeezed or just left behind. I haven’t touched a crochet hook in almost a year. I color occasionally, but often have to decide between coloring or reading. The stack of books by my bed causes me anxiety, so I feel guilty about coloring instead of reading them. Funny thing is…coloring helps with anxiety more than reading. Perhaps I should grab my coloring books and pencils more than I grab a book filled with words.
According to Pew, I read more than the people they surveyed. And I’m pretty sure I read more than several of my co-workers. But when you tend to spend a lot of time on the bookish interwebz, it can never feel like enough. There’s always another book you must read. Sometimes 7-10 in a week. I have zero patience for uninteresting books, if it doesn’t grab me immediately it will most likely end up forgotten like the pile below all of those library books. (I WILL finish a few of them…I WILL!)
Another thing I haven’t figured out how to fit into my life: Shutterfly. I miss it so much. I hardly have time to move images onto my back-up hard drive from my phone (it is both a blessing and a curse to have 128 GB of space on my phone), much less organize them into a photo album of our lives. It’s almost time for our annual album and I’ve gotten through January (I went back to work in February, so…). I’ve got thousands of photos to sort through…perhaps we’ll get our desktop fixed (ha! add it to the list of all the things we have to spend money on) soon so I have a computer with a real disk space (I’ve only got an HP Stream to use now…very limited hd space).
So how do other people do this? How do they make it work? How do they balance ALL OF THIS? Is this why so many marriages end in divorce? There’s no me-time anymore so people get bitter and unhappy and the marriage falls apart? I’m not suggesting we’re anywhere close to that, but I can see why it happens. I’m lucky to have Jesse. He makes the marriage part easy and he does his best to make sure I get a couple of days to myself a month — on those days I get facials or massages or become one with the couch (or fit in dentist appointments and haircuts and laundry).
I’ll figure it out eventually. I’ve heard it’ll get easier after it gets harder. I’m aware that I still have the really challenging days of toddlerhood ahead.
Funny thing: I’ve given up on wearing any color other than black to work to cut down on 1. shopping, 2. loads of laundry, 3. thinking about how I look. I’ve kept it so simple the past few weeks and it’s been AMAZING. How did I not discover this sooner? Black shirts, black pants, black shoes, red lipstick, crazy hair (its natural state), maybe simple accessories. So easy, so awesome, and I’ve never gotten so many compliments before in my life about 1. my awesome lipstick (yes…I still love red lipstick, in this photo it’s Ruby Woo pencil and lipstick with an Urban Decay primer), 2. how thin I look (no, I haven’t lost weight…in fact, I’ve probably gained some), 3. my Betseyville glasses (that I’ve worn for at least 2 years), 4. my crazy hair (who knew a middle part was on point (is this where I can use the word “fleek”)?! I can thank my nutso postpartum new hairs for this. There’s no controlling them, so sometimes I can’t do anything about how my hair parts. I could do an entire post about my new hairs. It looks like I got bangs, but weird wispy super fine bangs…all over my head).
At least I’ve figured one thing out…kind of.