Labels and Expectations.

Sometimes my brain plays tricks.

See…I’m getting married in just over a month. I know this. I have the future husband and the wedding gown and the rings and the plans and the decorations…you know, all of the stuff.

But over the last couple of days I’ve realized a few things that weren’t really connecting. I am getting married. I am going to be a WIFE. I will have a HUSBAND.

It’s crazy.

The whole wife thing really throws me off. It’s a label I never thought would apply to me. Despite the fact that occasionally I thought I’d birth some babies, I never really put it all together into it’s package. I mean, before Jesse, I didn’t really have a boyfriend…I’ve never even been a fan of labels. Or commitment really. It was all so serious, you know? Long-term relationships just seemed silly.

But then I met Jesse and he’s amazing. Why in the world would I throw him back in the ocean for some other fisher-woman to catch? So the labels happened, but now…now…I have this new label to wrap my head around and it’s just insane. I mean, wife. I don’t feel old enough to be a wife. Aren’t wives supposed to be in their 40s?

It’s just insane.

While I’m trying to wrap my brain around that new label, I also have to deal with people and their expectations for our wedding. People are asking what kind of “activities” we’re planning other than the wedding. Seriously? I have to plan other things? I’m already planning one of the more significant days of my entire life and now a guest wants me to plan events for THEM other than our ceremony and reception?

And then others ask me, “do you plan on spending time with your out-of-town guests?” Seriously? If someone wants me to spend time with them outside of the actual wedding, I sure hope they’re OK with bonding over centerpieces and doing my hair.

I mean, I’ve been an out-of-town guest at a wedding before and I didn’t expect the bride and/or groom to hang out with me. I went to see them get married. I went to see my friend in a wedding dress. I went to see her start a new journey with the man she loves.

But are people really coming to spend time with us? Do they expect us to have a lot of time to spend? Aren’t people coming more to bask in the glow of our happiness rather than wanting to actually bond with us? I just don’t understand. Activities?!

So there are crafts to be crafted. Labels to be grasped. And now even more expectations to live up to…apparently, some sort of “activity” to plan. Weddings are fun.

So as far as activities go I’ve decided to leave the planning of these extracurricular events up to our MOH and BM. It will probably involve dancing and drinks and some debauchery. Because I’ve gotta tell you…I’m pretty much done with planning. And I’m definitely tired of spending money.

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